As we all know, life comes in seasons. Some years are wonderful and amazing with very few worries and plenty of everything. Others are leaner, more troublesome, and just plain sad. In the good years, the holidays are a lot of fun, but during the times when you are sad, we may not enjoy Christmas all that much, and that’s ok. Holidays are the toughest for any of us when life just sucks feels like double sad. It can be hard to hide from those who are having a wonderful holiday season. 🙁

There’s a lot of pressure put on us by the media and society alike to put on a smile be “merry and bright” during the holidays. Who are they kidding? How are we magically supposed to be in a good mood on Christmas no matter what’s going on in our lives or around us? Now, sure you should hide your pain and sorrow and smile through the tears for your kids. Of course you don’t want to ruin Christmas for those around you. But let’s face it, sometimes life sucks and when it happens around Christmas, it’s hard to put on a show of good cheer.

There’s nothing wrong with being sad around the holidays.

If you’re recently lost a loved one and are facing your first Christmas without them, it’s perfectly normal and healthy to be sad. You miss them, and not being able to share such a wonderful time of the year with this special person makes it harder to feel joy and happiness.

When something does put a smile on your face, you may even feel guilty, that is normal to feel that way.

I have a really good friend who just lost her husband of many years, and its been tough for her. Does she feel sad? Oh you bet she does.. But she knows it will get better over time, as it will for you. She remembers the past and knows that even though he is gone, he still with her in her heart.

Maybe you lost your job a few weeks ago and can’t give your kids the gifts they’ve been asking Santa for. Having to explain to children makes things even tougher. Maybe a relationship fell apart and you’re still trying to figure out what your life looks like now. Lots of different things can happen that will take a lot of the joy out of Christmas. And you know what? That’s ok.

Despite the picture TV shows, movies, and Christmas stories paint, our troubles don’t magically go away come Christmas Eve. It would be wonderful if it did, but that isn’t the real world. We are still grieving, broke, and feeling lost. And that’s ok. Life isn’t always perfect. It’s messy, complicated, sad, and sometimes just plain sucks – even on Christmas.

My best advice when you’re having a tough time during the holidays is this. Don’t feel pressured to put yourself in a good mood if you don’t want to be. Don’t expect to feel better all of sudden, that just doesn’t happen and during the holidays makes it so much tougher. Just try to get through the Holidays the best you can. Do what you need to do for the little ones, and then go and have a good cry. Be mad, be sad, or be angry. Feel what you need to feel to get through this hard period in life.

But also remember this, things do get better. Things will look up and there are many happy days and happy Christmases ahead, its ok if this isn’t good for you this year. Remember the good times that happened in the past and know in your heart that better times are yet to come.

If this isn’t the best Christmas for you, what are you doing to help you put up with all the happy cheerful people around you? Leave your answers in the comments below.. 🙂