You may have heard the saying, “‘No. It is a complete sentence.” If not, it’s definitely something you should keep in mind for your daily life. While you don’t necessarily want to say no all the time, it’s important to know that you CAN when you need to.
It can be easy to fall into the trap of “people pleasing” your way through life, and never setting healthy boundaries for yourself. Sometimes it comes to how we are raised, as well as which generation we come from. This is an understandable struggle—you want to make the people around you happy and not let them down! However, you must consider your own life and feelings sometimes.
Taking stock of your mental, emotional, and physical health is part of how you can decide when it’s okay to say no.
There are ways of saying no.. I can still hear my mom (and I bet yours too!) No! Because I said so!! Hand raising anyone? Yeah, I thought so 😉
Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to help you know when you need to take a step back from being everything to everyone:
What else is on my plate?
If you simply have too much to do, and you’re overwhelmed… Say no.
Do I WANT to do this?
It’s important to realize that you don’t have to have an elaborate reason to say no. Not wanting to, can be enough.
Am I in the right mindset for this?
Sometimes what is happening in our own life can make certain things just too much to do… For example, planning a birthday party might not be a great project to take on right after a death in the family.
Does this person consistently take advantage of me?
It’s an unfortunate fact that there are lots of people that seek out people to manipulate and take advantage of. You can find these people everywhere, so always stay vigilant, and make sure they aren’t doing it to you. TRUE friends and HEALTHY family will have relationships with you that are built on give AND take.
Have I had any “me time” lately?
Self-care is vital to a happy and healthy life. If you’re constantly going and going and doing things for everyone else—you’re neglecting yourself. What could be worse is, they expect you to keep doing what they want, and they forget that you are a person with wants and desires as much as they do. When this happens, burnout, stress, anxiety, and more can creep in and create lots of other issues in your life.
Take time to make time to take care of YOU. I know it’s hard, and sometimes you might hurt the feelings of the person who is asking for your help.
I hope this has helped you to take a look at your habits of how much you say no to people when you should. It’s okay to stand up for yourself and say no when something just isn’t a good fit for you at the time. 😀
